As a parent, it can be difficult to set house rules for your children. You want to give them freedom and independence but also need to protect them from harm and ensure they have the best start in life. It can be a delicate balancing act, but there are five essential house rules for kids that you should consider implementing if you want them to stay happy and healthy.
These house rules will provide structure, support their development, and help keep everyone safe in the home environment. Read on to discover these five house rules that could make all the difference!
5 House Rules That Everyone Can Live With
1. Respect Each Other: This house rule will ensure that your kids have respect for each other, as well as for themselves and their parents. This house rule can help encourage healthy communication and problem-solving skills as well as reduce any potential conflict or tension between siblings or family members. But what exactly does this mean to respect each other?
Put simply, respect means treating each other with kindness and understanding. It means listening to each other’s opinions, being patient with one another, and showing gratitude for shared experiences.
In our home, our children are, first and foremost, taught about love and respect. They show this first as children who will address mom and dad, in response to us, as Yes, Ma’am, Yes, Sir. Any adult figure in their life that they are introduced to is addressed as Ms. {First Name} or Mr. {First Name}. There is no exception, as one of our top house rules – it’s paramount that our children grow up respecting their elders, just as a thriving community would expect from a child growing into a functional, loving adult.
Modern-day House Rules Your Grandparents Would Love: House Rules Examples
2. Use Technology Appropriately: A house rule for technology can help ensure your kids are using devices responsibly and not over-indulging in their use. Set a house rule to limit the amount of time spent on screens, as well as the types of content they are allowed to access. Don’t be afraid to take (yes, t.a.k.e.) your child’s device and inspect their communication habits, any social media accounts, and the like.
You are the parent. Some people tend to forget this with the distracting noise of modern-day inappropriateness. Technology in our household is a privilege, not a right to abuse or disrespect.
3. Keep Noise Levels Reasonable: Create a house rule around noise level expectations. This house rule will help reduce any potential stress or tension in the home, as well as ensure that there are no disturbances to neighbors. Now, we tend to be a “loud” household ourselves, but there are set times when Mom has had enough and everyone needs to be quiet.
I need my quiet time and I command loving respect from my children to give it to me. Likewise, giving them the space they need, and/or obnoxious game time my boys enjoy with one another.
4. Treat Everyone and Everything with Care – Especially According to Your Faith: Teach your kids about responsibility through house rules for taking care of their belongings, respecting the property of others, and being kind to everyone they meet – in our case just as Jesus would (Love Thy Neighbor as Thy Self). This house rule can help foster a sense of appreciation and empathy in your children. Raise them, as you model yourself, how to love on one another (according to their love language).
What does that look and feel like? What does one’s mindset focus on?
5. Be Honest: Honesty is one of the most important house rules to set with your kids, as it will help encourage trust within the family as well as teach children to take responsibility for their actions. If you want your children to be honest with you, you’ve got to open up to them and show them what honesty looks like. This is when you are vulnerable and share age-appropriate experiences that allow them to learn from you. That’s a house rule that we have in our house: create an environment where it is safe for our children to make mistakes and open up about their successes, failures, questions, and concerns.
With these house rules in mind, be sure to revisit the conversation regularly with your kids. Kids grow and change quickly – so house rules should be often revisited and adjusted as needed. As a parent, it is your job to make sure they understand the house rules and why they are important. Ultimately, house rules will help you create a safe environment for your family while teaching valuable life lessons to your kids.
We do have one more. Though this isn’t one of the house rules, it’s a lifetime skill and can be one that leads to a loving, authentic life, or one that doesn’t. The most vulnerable “rule” – Open & Authentic Communication.
We have 2 ears and 1 mouth for a reason. Listen twice as much as you speak. We encourage our children to listen to what the other has to say. We encourage them to tell the other person how they feel after certain words or actions have been taken. “I’m telling mom” doesn’t go very far. They learn to communicate back to themselves. It’s not blaming or offending – it’s effective communication using words that meet their intentions.
So for example, instead of saying, you are making me mad…that is an example of very poor communication because, in reality, NO ONE can make a person “mad”. A person can evoke feelings of anger in someone, but is it the person feeling it who is responsible, not the other person. So, in this example, it would be more clear and more accurate to say: those words you said make me feel angry or upset, so let me explain to you why that is. I don’t know if that was your intention, but I had a negative emotional response (which is not their fault, as the person feeling those emotions, is).
Make the House Rules Simple & Consistent
This takes p.r.a.c.t.i.c.e!!! Every conflict or misunderstanding is a time to practice, listen, listen some more, and then respond appropriately. Far too often we (including myself) get caught up and react to our feelings instead of responding to what the person said. This is one of those unspoken “house rules” that can make a profound impact in such a positive way. It’s crazy stupid how perception, misunderstandings, and lack of listening can “offend” someone who communicates poorly. Don’t let that be you or yours!
Setting house rules is an essential part of raising children, and these five house rules will help ensure that your kids are happy, healthy, and well-adjusted. Implementing house rules can be difficult at first as you establish your expectations with your children but will pay off in the long run. With house rules in place, you can be sure that your kids are growing up with the best possible start in life.
If you have some family house rules, what are they?
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